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if i seem bored, it's because i am
09.25.03 2:55 p.m.
the only way to gain tangible possessions is to work for them. more and more, i'm becoming convinced that the only way to gain high-quality emotional (intangible) goods is to work against them. yes, i'm going to elaborate. some people, so it seems, are naturally able to attract the things we all seek - meaningful relationships with others, be they friendships or romance. this happens much to the bewilderment (and endless envy) of the rest of us. whether it's something they've done right in the past or whether it's simply God saying, "here, you can have this, but keep in mind that you're going to be screwed over in another part of your life because of it," i'm still trying to figure out. at any rate, they have them, and we want them. the rest of us are left with two options to attempt to fill a void that we can't fill ourselves: date anyone and everyone possible, or wait. the ones who take the first road are rarely fulfilled in their emotional lives; they simply create new problems. the more patient ones tend to become frustrated and bitter. creating success out of this seeming downward spiral - how can it be done? the only road i can see out of it as of now is to fight this need. we have something inside of us that says, "i need other people to survive - other people to connect with in a meaningful way." this voice must be silenced. the path of desperation rarely leads up. this, however, is where it gets tricky and requires self-control and alertness. like everything, making yourself completely independent can be taken too far. those who do so have an inconvenient tendency to become sociopaths. the goal here is to make yourself comfortable where you are. once you have figured out how to live on your own, you are ready to make the adjustment to live with another. we are born alone, with no one able to thoroughly understand our needs and desires; and we will die alone, with no one able truly empathize with us - we must be content with that solitude, or we will never be secure in a relationship. thus, the only way to gain a relationship is to not want one; when the burning desire is quenched, opportunities can begin to arise. good luck. i'll need it. a brief and terribly undescriptive return - 10.28.04 |